They're All Going To Laugh At You

They're all going to laugh at you.
They’re laughing at you. Let’s face it. When you start a business, you’re probably going to fail.

I mean, you’re practically doomed from the start. 90% of all businesses don’t make it five years. Even if you have successfully run a business before, you’re probably rusty at that whole “starting” thing.

You probably won’t make it.

Your customers are going to ask for refunds. They’re going to take their lack of success out on you. They’re going to tell you you didn’t perform (regardless of whether you did or not.)

They won’t pay you. Their checks will bounce. Their credit cards will get declined. They’ll promise to pay…every week, for the next month…and never pay. Suddenly, their phone number will get disconnected.

They’ll call you up and attack you personally, spewing venom you never thought you’d hear outside of an R-rated gangsta movie. They will laugh at your feeble attempts to make it right. They’ll threaten to sue you. They will get their local police department to call you.

They will leave anonymous comments on the Internet about how awful your company is, and, by extension, how awful you must be as a person.

They’ll complain that you charge them too much. They will threaten to cancel. They will cancel, and then when your broken billing system decides to bill them again, you won’t be able to refund it quickly enough to spare the hate mail, hate calls, and hate letters.

In short, they’re all going to laugh at you. In fact, they’re probably already laughing at you. I bet you can hear it right now in your head: “You’re so stupid. You’ll never be able to figure this Internet thing out. You don’t have time for this. You’re not young any more. You have mouths to feed! How could you possibly consider quitting your job?”

If you’re thinking I’m about to make it all better, I’m not. What I just listed above (including the part where the police department called me) is all real. It all happened to me in the course of running my business. I once let a customer rant on the phone for just over an hour (I timed it) while I transferred the call to my cell phone, put on my headset, and drove home. I listened to him ranting in my ear about how awful our service was the entire time.

As you’re reading this, some emotions are probably coming to the surface. At least one of them is likely to be a memory of when something like this has happened to you in the past. And maybe it’s scaring the crap out of you. You don’t want to run a business like that, you’re thinking. Who in their right mind would sign up for that?

But some of you…some of you are different. Sure, there are probably fears and doubts in there, and you may even question your own sanity. But somewhere, deep down inside, something is fighting to rise up. Something is saying, not, “It won’t happen to me,” but “I will find some way to handle this.” Because it will happen to you. Don’t kid yourself. You can run a great company, and you’re going to get shit flung at you every single day. It’s just how business works.

This post is for the fighters out there. It’s a reminder that you can do this. It’s a reminder that we all get the crap beat out of us, if not physically, then emotionally. Life isn’t always a cake walk. No matter how big or small a business you run, no matter how much money you have…this world is full of people who will want nothing more than to tear you down and see you fail. Online or in person; customer, employee, best friend or family member…they’re going to want you to fail, for reasons beyond your control.

To be okay with this, you have to first acknowledge it. Only by acknowledging that the hate is out there will you be able to get past the fear that is inside you and take the next step.

I don’t know about you, but I’d rather wake up each morning knowing that I’m bringing my absolute best to the table than wake up looking over my shoulder and asking “What if?”

The haters will be there no matter what you choose. Choose something that will make you happy.

Now go out there and change the world!

Recommended Reading:

Download my free Blog Success Manifesto. Want to start a blog–or do you already run one? This is a must-download; I showcase how I created a successful blog without killing myself in the process. 63 pages; 30 tactical tips…and oh yeah, it’s completely free!

Brent says:

9/25/2009 at 8:01 am

Brutal story, but made for a fun read.
My favorite part “If you’re thinking I’m about to make it all better, I’m not.” Thanks for sharing.

Cédric Pariente says:

9/25/2009 at 10:13 am

Hi Erica,

This is a pretty interesting post.
I guess you have to be in this situation of starting a business in order not to expect the “make it all better” part of the blog.
I wasn’t.
I’ve actually started my business in January this year and it’s just starting to be “ok” for me.
I had an awful year in terms of social life, I could not take care of my friends, my family, the people who matter the most for me… but I guess I’m quite lucky, they’re still here and very supportive.
And most important, I’m still here, doing what I like and my business is starting to take off.
I’m not saying the “problems” are behind. They simply changed.
But I still like what I do, I have more time for the people I really want to see, and I’m happy. That’s the most important.

Thanks for sharing Erica.
Cédric.

ps:
I sent a question to you by email, but maybe it’s easier for you if I post a comment directly in your post “to free or not to free?”.
What would you prefer?

Cath Lawson says:

9/25/2009 at 11:26 am

Hi Erica – Great post and so true. I’m glad you wrote it though – at least folk just starting up will know that it isn’t just them, when the shit starts hitting them.

Your call in the car reminds me of a drunk customer who phoned me every night for a week while I was trying to make my dinner. His problem had already been solved but I don’t think he had anything better to do than hassle me. I felt like some customers simply hated the fact that I was a woman.

I hate the phone so much since my last two businesses that I’m desperately going to try avoid using it at all in the future.

Dave Doolin says:

9/25/2009 at 11:43 am

Basically, I don’t pay much attention to advice from anyone working for a salary.

I’ve also developed a lot more compassion for anyone in business for themselves.

Carlin says:

9/25/2009 at 11:47 am

Hi Erica!
Wow, awesome post! Thank you!
So true what Cath said too, So many times we only hear the success stories, so when our own life or biz sucks, we think we’re doing something wrong! I’ve gotten a lot from reading your story and posts, thanks for sharing the “real” story!

For me, yeah, I can relate. I shot weddings for 10 years, photo and video, and had some customers who just took the fun out of the job. To the point I wanted to quit. But times like that you gotta remember the ones who LOVE you, and it makes it all worth while 🙂

Happy Friday!
Carlin

Toma says:

9/25/2009 at 12:10 pm

Hello Erica,
Did you just happen to hear me sobbing today? This article came at the right time; today was one of those “break-down” days for me. Business is slow, international orders have been lost and I’ve actually considered returning to working outside the home.
In my heart, I know I won’t quit, because you are right, there are people out there who want me to do just that. When times get rough, I have to remind myself of all the people (across the world) I am making happy by providing my services. Because really, the good parts of owing your own business usually outweigh all of the bad, it’s just hard to see it sometimes.
Enjoy your weekend!

Patty says:

9/25/2009 at 1:33 pm

Erica – can’t get the manifesto – do you have another link 🙂 ?

Andrew says:

9/25/2009 at 2:22 pm

Well that gives me something to look forward to! Here’s to getting trodden on, but hopefully only for a short while until it’s all a huge success.

Baker says:

9/25/2009 at 6:25 pm

Love it, erica.

Way to tell it how it is. Sometimes we can enter into things with those rose-colored glasses. This isn’t about shooting down people’s dreams, it’s about showing them where the kinks are so that they can make their dreams bulletproof.

Jenny Silva says:

9/25/2009 at 8:30 pm

Erica, Well done – when you enter a business you have so much excitment and vigor but when results done appears when you desire them too your courage can take a battering. It’s great to know that you may get tested and challenged to max when the reward ahead is so GREAT.

Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome says:

9/25/2009 at 11:41 pm

In the show Glee, one character recently said something along the lines of “there’s not much difference between a crowd cheering for you or howling for your blood. Pretend they’re cheering and someday they will.”

VAL says:

9/26/2009 at 9:57 am

Hi Erica,

I smiled the entire time reading this post – BEEN THERE, DONE THAT!

Everything you mentioned, from irate customer rants (Usually via email) to being threatened with lawsuit and everything in between (Have not had Cop experience – thankfully) is absolutely true. Before I even decided to start my own business a member of my family warned, “You are going to go out there and fall flat on your face” – This has happened so many times that I had lost count, really.

To this day, I still question my own sanity for starting venture after venture (I like to start businesses) and I have resolved to describe them as “Learning experiences”. Some of my business ideas made money, others did not.

However the truth on the other side is that the successes were sweet, unimaginable accomplishments that have made it all worth the failures that it required to reach this level (Now a young retiree doing what I want, just as you). Oh, and the family member has since recanted (Eaten) that previously mentioned statement a number of times over the last few years. So, in closing I 100% agree with your advice: Follow Your Heart!

Jonathan says:

9/26/2009 at 11:18 am

All very true. My brother and I noticed that the more successful his online business becomes, the more vicious his competitors and some of his clients. It comes with the territory!

Hal says:

9/26/2009 at 4:07 pm

Yep, “people are people” as the song goes (especially here in Los Angeles where I live:-)), and most are doomed by their lack of business experience and patience when it comes to making a full time income.

I’ve been making a full time income specializing in SEO/SEM and developing affiliate businesses for over five years now, and it’s been great, but it didn’t happen overnight.

E.G. I’ve been online marketing a product, and/or service since 1995 with thousands of hours, and dollars invested (and made) to grow and have learned a lot. Plus still there is a lot to learn, i.e. school is never out.

Yes, I had failed a few dozen times along the way, however I learned fast from my mistakes, and kept moving forward.

BE A MAN…

This is for the Guys… treat your business like you would a Women you Love, i.e with respect, and invest time, and energy to grow the relationship, and don’t forget you’re a Man, because with Women (or your business for that matter), once you become a Whiner/complainer, your done (i.e. stick a fork in it), because your business will run, and so will your Women. Get it? :–)) Anyway… it was fun visiting for a minute, however I gotta bounce… Hal

Pat with SPI says:

9/26/2009 at 9:27 pm

There are going to be haters no matter what you choose to do. There is one thing you can do, however, to make life a little better during the process of starting a business:

Surround yourself with supportive people, whether it be those family members who do believe you can do it, or people on the internet who are trying to do the same thing as you.

This is what I did when I was starting my business, and when people told me I was crazy, even after I succeeded, I replied with a, “Have fun waking up in the morning to go back to your 9 to 5 job that you love so much.”

Diane says:

9/28/2009 at 6:14 am

We were born to succeed, not to fail.”

— Henry David Thoreau (1818-1862). Author and philosopher

Steve says:

9/29/2009 at 5:48 am

I think the good question, in light of this post, is to ask yourself, “How many people in my life are laughing at me?” If there aren’t any, be worried!

Ben says:

9/29/2009 at 9:46 pm

I think one good way to get past all the “head junk” that can slow you down is to hook up with a mentor or “mastermind” group. When the doubters start to get into your head, you can have a chat with your mentor or biz support group and they can put you back on track.

Lisa says:

10/6/2009 at 1:55 pm

thanks for the inspiration! I’m considering of venturing out on my own one day, and people laughing at me is one of my fears. Your post really help put it all in perspective though.

MissMentor

Flora says:

10/7/2009 at 1:10 am

Hi Erica, I like your blog even though I would love to read more posts !
I’m a shy person, and I suffered a lot from people laughing at me in my childhood. Today, I try not to think about what people may think, in particular people who don’t know me. Why care about the opinion of someone who doesn’t know who you are, and why you do the things that you do ? I juste care about what people I love think. It allows me to be myself more.

Art says:

10/10/2009 at 5:59 am

My partner and I are literally just starting out our joint venture. I spent years giving my services away for free until I was recently convinced that I should monetize them. Your post was amazing for two reasons:
1. It was good for me to hear from someone I didn’t know and
2. It was the push my wife needed to embrace her photography.

Thanks for your post and would love to have the opportunity to ask you additional questions.

P.S. The manifesto was great!

Financial Samurai says:

11/2/2009 at 8:25 pm

I loved it when this girl laughed at the name “Financial Samurai” when I first started it. IT gave me so much motivation to prove her wrong. I love rejection, and that’s why I wrote “You’re Rejected! How I Use Rejection To Motivate Me Every Single Day!”

Best, FS

Sheta says:

12/29/2010 at 12:22 am

I knew my fear of someone trying to make a public ass of me was a reasonable and realistic fear, so I came up with ways to express my determination not to be thwarted. My business is young enough that so far I haven’t had to face anyone offline, and yes I’m scared but I know I can take it, now. Your post makes me feel less paranoid, and definitely glad I took these steps. I’ll be venturing into more public venues in 2011 and I’m going need my resolve. 🙂

Annie says:

1/15/2011 at 3:46 pm

And that reminds me Céline Dion. I remember when she was young, lots of peuple were laughing at her. I think she was lucky enough to have Rene Angélil to protect her from the sarcasm. do I need to say who’s laughing now?